Where do I begin... 12 and a bit weeks ago I found out that I was expecting a little baby, this being our 5th baby. At first my excitement was masked by worry, fear , as we tried to get our head around how we could possibly have another baby, how would we ''cope'' emotionally, physically ....
This may make me sound so heartless but in truth I just wasn't sure what I felt, I cried when I first saw them two pink lines on the test,(I felt guilty feeling like that but as many other women would give their life to see them lines) but ironically I was worrying about what people might think or say when they find out, My partner shared the same feelings too. But , the more I sat and thought about It, The more I give myself a good shake, why the hell should I be worrying about what other people might think of MY decision to have another baby! So what I have 4 already, so what I'm 32!! Myself and my partner both work, depend on no-one but ourselves! and if I do say so myself we are bloody fantastic parents, yes like many others we have had our hard times and struggles, but it has made us stronger , both as parents and as a couple. Don't get me wrong becoming a mummy at 18 was thee hardest thing I have ever done in my life, I grew up fast, by no means are we given a hand book in how to be a ''perfect parent'' , or the truth about what its like to be pregnant, warning us about sleepless nights, being pee'd and poo'd on, how to dodge projectile vomit... how to cope with cankles, piles, saggy boobs, cracked nipples, feeling like your internal organs are going to drop out your vagina with each step you take after giving birth or even how to kiss bye bye to our pre-baby bodies.!! No, we learn all that the hard way,by going through it ourselves, learning what's right and what's wrong when becoming a parent, and yet here I am almost 14 years later and I'm still learning for god sake and will do until the day I pass, but what I am actually getting at here is when has it become socially acceptable for others to ask questions, pass remarks or quite frankly be bloody too forward for my own liking when it comes to me, my body and my pregnancy??
what has actually brought me to right this blog post is, through out the past few weeks I have had people ask me the rudest questions, ones that I would never think of even asking myself!! for example, in conversation with another adult,( and I cant emphasis that word ADULT enough because seriously my 13yr old would have even asked me this) upon telling her my news , her remark was, Jesus your 5th! are you getting steralized after this one! well if the ground could have opened up there and then I would have jumped in and hid, I don't know if I was more upset or embarrassed. What business is it of anyone should I continue to have any more or not, that choice is mine and mines only!! The same way its a woman's right to decide if she ever has any children at all. She then continued with was baby tplanned??? sweet and gentle Jesus , Mary , St Joseph and the wee Donkey.... was it planned??? How do you answer that ?? its safe to say that I did not answer, but how can you ask anyone that and expect them to give you an answer?? what did she expect me to say, aw god aye it was planned we were doing the baby dance alllll the time!!! I was mortified.
Which then takes me onto another popular asshole comment, Oh your 5th baby , aren't you a bit young , how are you going to manage to pay for them all.... not that its anything to do with them, but I feel I need to justify my own pregnancy to them there and then by shouting from the flipping roof tops I f**king work all the hours god sends, myself and my partner are like passing ships in the night, but again what business is it of yours! I would love to know what actually goes through peoples minds that's makes them think that its Ok to ask anyone that?? Are they silly enough not to know by now that the words they choose to come out of their mouths can burrows holes in someone! Don't we spend years raising our children up to be kind to others, choose words wisely etc, yet here I am writing a post about the idiotic ,hurtful comments ADULTS say.... aw and another I have had is , are you Breast feeding this one?... listen ''love'' if I decide to become a human flipping milk machine then that's not a fecking thing that I would be telling you... in the middle of the street ... mid conversation..
There should be a book given to these people of things not to say to pregnant women, because clearly they don't know already. I 'm sure that if any of you lovely lot are expecting then you too have also come across these kind of remarks comments, Do you react like I do? Do you feel the need to defend your reasons of having babies? and if you have please share in comments.
Anyway after going in a wee bit of a rant there I can safely say that we are over the bloody moon that we are expecting another wee addition to our family in march 2017, yes we might struggle to settle the little ones into a new routine but as before we will manage and couldn't have asked for a better gift, and too all those in future who feel the need to question it ( middle finger up) as Queen Bee herself says.
I hope you all enjoy reading , for now its love , hugs and kisses from
